


Too Late to Bare my Heart

by radkoko



Category: Naruto
Genre: Angst with a Happy Ending, Canon Compliant, M/M, Regret
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-09-10
Updated: 2017-09-10
Packaged: 2018-12-26 02:57:52
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,188
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12049881
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/radkoko/pseuds/radkoko
Summary: When Tenzou comes to Kakashi for help Kakashi is ready to leap into action to help his friend...until he finds out exactly what Tenzou wants help with.For KakaIru Fic Fest Summer 2017 Romance Prompt #2A lover woos another for a friend, considering himself insufficient for the beloved's attention (source: Cyrano de Bergerac, by Edmond Rostand)





	Too Late to Bare my Heart

**Author's Note:**

> When I saw this prompt on the list I knew I had to do it, since an almost identical prompt had been sitting on my computer for almost 3 years. It just takes a Fic Fest to kick my butt into gear. Not quite as Cryano as I'd planned it to be, but hopefully you all still enjoy it as much as I enjoyed writing it.

“Sempai, I need your help,” Tenzou said as he sat down across from Kakashi. 

“Are you sure?” Kakashi asked. While he hadn’t looked up from his book, he had stopped reading. It was rare for Tenzou to admit he needed Kakashi’s help, even though Kakashi would tout that Tenzou needed it more often than he asked for it. 

Out of the corner of his eye he saw Tenzou glancing around the Jounin break room hesitating, “Can we talk about it at your place tonight?” 

Kakashi lowered his book to look around the room. There were a few Jounin scattered about, but he couldn’t think of a reason Tenzou shouldn’t be able to discuss matters with him here unless it was ANBU related. It must be something important if Tenzou needed more privacy than this room offered so Kakashi gave him a stern nod, and went back to his book to avoid drawing attention to their conversation. 

It was tough to go about his day like normal when his brain kept jumping back to his conversation with Tenzou earlier. Maybe it didn’t have to be ANBU related, Tenzou was currently the leader of the former Team 7 so it could have something to do with Naruto. There were plenty of reasons to keep a discussion about the boy behind closed doors. 

Kakashi’s mind wouldn’t rest long enough to even read without trying to piece together what Tenzou had wanted to talk about. 

As soon as he got home that evening Kakashi set a kettle on the stove for tea and sat down on his couch. He tried to relax, but if anyone watched him they would know he was poised to leap up at any second. Most people would think he was nervously waiting for an attack, but to him this was almost worse. 

When he heard the rap of someone’s knuckled on his door it took everything in him to not bolt to answer it. It seemed almost rude to be too eager to talk to Tenzou, even if they were friends. 

He still reached the door in record time, and opened it up to see just who he expected on the other side. Tenzou was waiting with his hands fidgeting by his sides. He held a stoic face, but it was obvious how nervous he was. After a nod to each other Tenzou slipped inside, faster than Kakashi could open it all the way. Kakashi raised his eyebrows at his friend’s nervousness, but gestured to the table where Tenzou could find the tea waiting for them. 

The pouring water was the only sound to penetrate the silence while Kakashi made their tea. He waited for Tenzou to speak up, but nothing came from his lips. Pale hands placed a cup of tea in front of each of them and Kakashi relaxed back into his seat to watch Tenzou, who was now even avoiding his eye contact. 

“So…” Kakashi prompted his companion. 

“I like someone,” Tenzou blurted out, face starting to glow red from the confession. 

The silence hit again, not even the sound of movement come this time as Kakashi stared at Tenzou. It was something he’d been hoping for Tenzou, to be part of the village, to feel open enough that he could find someone to be with. What confused Kakashi was why Tenzou was being so secretive about it. He thought back to the Jounin in the room, wondering if maybe Tenzou’s object of affection had been sitting there near them. How Tenzou expected Kakashi’s help, he wasn’t sure. Kakashi had not had much luck with love in many years, and Tenzou was well aware of that fact. 

“Kakashi…” Tenzou whispered, eyes wider than normal with a soft edge that made him look vulnerable. He was scared. 

“So, how can I help you?” Kakashi asked, knowing he had to do something to help his friend. 

“Tell me everything you can about Iruka.” 

Iruka?  
That was who Tenzou liked? 

Of course it was Iruka… Kakashi thought. Iruka was a smart intelligent man, well loved by the village and friendly to even the most undeserving of people. Not that Tenzou was underserving of love, but maybe somewhere deep down Kakashi thought that of himself. There was one small problem. Kakashi was completely in love with Iruka, and had never let Tenzou know. 

Life was cruel, Kakashi knew it far better than anyone else, but this was a new low in his life. He looked at Tenzou, seeing the tight eyebrows and pursed lip that wrote concern all over his face. Stepping back now wasn’t something he could do. Tenzou was his friend and he was going to help him. 

“Why don’t you tell me why you like him first,” Kakashi said walling up his heart ready to support Tenzou. 

Tenzou smiled, “I don’t really know. There’s just something about him that makes me feel happy.” 

Kakashi nodded, more in personal agreement than in support. 

“He wants to better everyone, and is so great with the academy students. Naruto and him are close like siblings, sometimes Naruto will talk for hours on end about him. It’s hard to not fall in love with that.” Kakashi could feel himself falling in love all over again. Tenzou had gotten all the right things to love about Iruka, still the stabbing continued as Kakashi tampered down the thoughts about how he’d known Iruka for longer. They had commiserated for the years when Naruto was gone while Tenzou had only met Iruka two months ago when he became the new lead of Team 7. 

“So, will you help me?” Tenzou asked. 

Kakashi hesitated long enough to make Tenzou’s worry visible on his face. 

“Yes.” 

“Thank you,” Tenzou replied, reaching a hand over to place on Kakashi’s shoulder. It took everything in Kakashi to not shake it off for betraying himself. 

~~~ 

Tenzou had what he boasted to be an ingenious idea for how to get Iruka’s attention. 

“You’re so much better with words than I am, so just write a few letters for me to get his attention, then when I can get a date with him, you can help me prepare so I don’t sound quite like an idiot.” 

“I can’t write letters for you,” Kakashi deadpanned. 

“Why not?” Tenzou looked terrified at the thought. 

“He’ll recognize my writing,” Kakashi explained. 

“Not if you write like a normal human and not the chicken scratch that you normally turn in for your mission reports. I know you had better writing when you did ANBU reports.” 

Kakashi was a little miffed that Tenzou called his bluff, almost nobody in the village had seen his real writing so he expected it to be a good enough excuse, instead it was becoming an asset. 

“Okay, okay. I’ll write you some letters.” 

~~~ 

After the first few letters Kakashi’s imagination had started taking over for him. He hadn’t intended them to be so…graphic. How Tenzou hadn’t cursed Kakashi out for the contents of the letter he would never know. 

Sneaking into the academy was easy, and the perfect place to leave a letter or two for Iruka. Tenzou and Kakashi watched from the trees nearby as Iruka started picking up the letters, curious to its contents. As the letters became a little less work appropriate Kakashi and Tenzou started to wonder whether they should be finding a new place to hide them, but it wasn’t until an incident that they changed tactics. They watched as a student attempting to pull a prank on Iruka opened up his drawer to put down a rubber snake, only to find the letter. The boy pulled out the letter that had Iruka’s name and some goofy hearts all over it. Without checking to be sure the coast was clear he started opening the letter when Iruka came up behind him and grabbed his wrist, wrenching the letter from his hand. They couldn’t hear what was being said, but Iruka was bright red from yelling as he shoved the letter into his own satchel bag and started through the day’s lesson. 

They knew Iruka would never let them live it down if a student got ahold of one of the letters that were more adult appropriate so they decided his home was the best place to go next. What they didn’t prepare for was the bevy of traps that were set up around Iruka’s home. Leaving the first few letters shoved into the windowsill and one slipped into the mail slot wasn’t too hard, but then the traps came. Kakashi could sense the traps were there, but he wasn’t too sure what they did, so he sent in his clone to scope out the situation. When the clone came back covered in red paint, Kakashi knew they were going to be in trouble soon. Never were the traps intending to hurt, just something that would easily identify whomever was leaving the letters. 

When one clone came back with a bright purple star on his cheek, Kakashi wanted to laugh at the stupidity of Iruka’s pranks, it wasn’t until he was home later that he realized the mark transferred to him when he’d dismissed the clone. Iruka was clever. He must have realized that clones were being used to get around his traps and found a way to make something a little more permanent. It was pure luck that Kakashi had been the one to leave this letter since he’d be able to cover up the mark with his mask and hitai-ate. That was when Kakashi told Tenzou it was time to give Iruka one last letter. 

Kakashi went for something far more appropriate, not wanting Tenzou to get slapped in the face for giving Iruka something so lewd in public. It was a simple letter that spoke of Iruka’s unwavering beauty and heart, quite cheesy if Kakashi had to admit it, but all true. 

The planed it down to the moment, knowing Iruka’s schedule quite well after the weeks of getting letters to him. They would wait until he was at Ichiraku’s for dinner, and then find a way to casually bump into him on his way home. 

But when did things ever go that smoothly? 

Tenzou and Kakashi were walking along the road from Iruka’s to Ichiraku’s in the opposite direction that Iruka would be taking.  
“I can’t do this,” Tenzou admitted. 

“Yes you can, just take this letter,” Kakashi said holding the paper with two hands. He knew it would change everything. 

Tenzou took a deep breath out and started to grab the letter from Kakashi. 

“Ohh hey!” They heard Iruka call out as he started towards them. 

Tenzou snatched the letter away, hiding it behind his back before turning towards their new companion. “Good evening Iruka,” he said in his calm less emotive fashion. 

“Sensei,” Kakashi said with a small nod. 

“Everything alright?” Iruka asked with his usual mother hen concern. 

“I wanted to give you this,” Tenzou said handing the letter towards him. Iruka looked between the letter and the two of them before taking it into his hands. 

When Iruka opened the letter Kakashi felt the sting in his heart come back. He’d almost forgotten how much it hurt. As soon as Iruka’s attention was focused on the letter, he used it as a moment to slip away. Kakashi wasn’t looking forward to watching Tenzou and Iruka be happy right in front of him, and he was sure Tenzou would tell him all about it later. 

~~~ 

“He said yes,” Tenzou told Kakashi as soon as he let Tenzou into his home the next evening. 

“Really?” Kakashi hoped he didn’t sound quite so surprised to Tenzou’s ears, but somewhere deep in him had almost hoped Iruka would decline him. It was a horrible feeling when he thought it, since he wanted them both to be happy, but he didn’t necessarily want them to be happy with each other where he’d have to see it and be a part of it every day. 

“And we’re going on our date Saturday night,” Tenzou continued, so wrapped up in his happiness he couldn’t see Kakashi’s pain. “I need you there to help me.” 

“How? It won’t be a date if I’m there with you,” Kakashi explained. 

“Just come to the restaurant and sit nearby, you can sign to me or we can meet in the restroom and you can give me pointers.” 

“You don’t think that will be obvious?” 

“Things happen, I’m sure Iruka won’t think it’s strange.” 

“If you’re sure…” 

~~~~ 

On Saturday night Kakashi got ready to go out for an enjoyable dinner for one. Tenzou had told him the time and place they would be eating at and Kakashi told him he’d come about 15 minutes after them to make sure it didn’t look too suspicious. 

When Kakashi arrived at the restaurant he scanned the area picking Iruka out in an instant where he and Tenzou sat at a medium sized table. He watched Iruka smile at their waitress, chatting her up like he did with everyone. It seemed like Iruka knew everyone in the village and it showed by how much he enjoyed talking with the civilians and other shinobi on the streets. As Kakashi continued to watch that face he felt the pang in his heart tell him to just leave. Still he stayed as his head told him Tenzou needed his help, and he couldn’t turn around now. 

The hostess came up to him asking if anyone would be joining him that evening as he laughed it off, “No, just me,” Kakashi replied with a fake sheepish laugh and a scratch to his head. “Could I be seated at the bar?” He interjected before he could be put at a table for two alone. 

“Of course,” She replied with a knowing smile and walked him through the restaurant. 

The bar was an optimal choice anyway since it would allow him to see Tenzou without being seen by Iruka, although that was completely dashed when he was walked right past their table on his way to his seat. 

“Kakashi!” Iruka greeted him with his endearing smile, “What are you doing here?” 

Kakashi saw Tenzou’s shoulders slump and eyes relax, he could tell his friend had been tense while waiting for him to arrive. While Iruka had been smiling and laughing with the waiter, Kakashi hadn’t seen how the two of them were when they had been sitting at the table alone. 

“Just out for dinner,” Kakashi said as if it was something he did everyday; Iruka was sure to believe it since almost no one knew his daily habits. 

“You should join us.” 

Time stopped for an instant as Kakashi tried to process what Iruka meant. Of course Iruka was just being kind hearted like always, not wanting to let someone he knew eat alone, but Kakashi was sorely tempted to take him up on the offer. If it had been just the two of them he would have answered Iruka with an enthusiastic yes. It wasn’t until he saw Tenzou’s eyes wide with worry the Kakashi remembered why he was here in the first place. 

“You look like you’re on a date, that wouldn’t be very appropriate for me to join you,” Kakashi replied. 

“I don’t think Yamato would mind, especially if you’re all alone. You are both helping Naruto train I’d love to hear more about it.” 

“Sir, did you still want your spot at the bar?” the hostess interrupted, as she fiddled with the menus and glanced back at the front where other people were waiting to be seated. 

“Yes,” Kakashi replied to her before turning back to Iruka to wish him well, “You should enjoy your time alone, but I’ll see you around.” 

Iruka deflated immediately, eyes downcast from the refusal, and a weak wave as he walked away. Kakashi only knew he had done the right thing, when he saw Tenzou mouth a “thank you” to him after he sat down and glanced back at their table. 

Kakashi observed the couple, realizing they were not speaking much to each other. Maybe a “How’s work” or “Nice Weather”, but they were lacking the substantial conversations that were important for first dates. When Kakashi caught Tenzou’s eye he signaled for the man to meet him in the restroom to talk. 

“What’s happing,” Kakashi asked as soon as Tenzou entered the restroom. 

“I don’t know, we just don’t have anything to talk about…” Tenzou sounded defeated. 

“Tenzou… with Iruka if everything else fails, just talk to him about Naruto. He’ll listen to anything you say about that boy, and I’d bet he’d tell you some stories you’ve never heard about him as well.” 

Tenzou nodded his head. “Okay, thanks!” He took a breath and put on a smile before heading back out to the table. 

Looking into the mirror Kakashi looked at his lone darkened eye. He’d been having trouble sleeping since Tenzou had started asking for his help in this endeavor. It wasn’t going to be healthy for him to continue helping Tenzou much longer so he hoped this night was a success and he could rid his hands of Tenzou’s incessant conversations about Iruka. 

Kakashi took a deep breath and straightened his vest before heading back out to the bar. Taking a glance over at their table he watched Iruka giving an animated performance involving Naruto. His hands waved here and there, in some signature Naruto moves, and Kakashi was certain he knew precisely which story Iruka was telling. Kakashi swore he’d heard every Naruto story from Iruka at least twice over by now; it wasn’t a lie that Iruka could talk for hours about the boy. This story that he was telling to Tenzou was one of Kakashi’s favorites. 

Eating was the simple part of the meal, but Kakashi wasn’t that hungry. He had something small and glanced back at Tenzou once in a while seeing that the two of them were getting along quite well. If their night was going well, it was all the better for Kakashi so that he could leave without feeling guilty that Tenzou needed him. After paying his bill, Kakashi started back towards the door hoping to avoid an awkward moment by giving a causal wave as he passed Tenzou and Iruka. 

“Just the man I was talking about,” Iruka called his attention as Kakashi stepped past the table. 

“Me?” Kakashi asked. It was never good when people were talking about him. 

“Iruka was telling me a story about when you saved him and Naruto in the back hills,” Tenzou explained. 

Kakashi’s thoughts went back to that day. To be honest it was the spark that got him to notice Iruka, and the day when he’d started falling in love. They had met before, but this was when they really talked. Iruka didn’t give a second thought to who he was, and just continued complaining to him about how hard it was to teach Naruto. It wasn’t until a few days later that Kakashi went to find them in the hills only to find Iruka risking life and limb for the boy he’d so vehemently protested about days before. It might have been one of the most heroic things Kakashi had seen from a shinobi of Konoha since the night the Nine Tails attacked. 

“I was saying I probably wouldn’t still be here without you coming that day…not to mention where Naruto would be.” Iruka relayed, letting the smile turn into something softer. 

“Just doing my duty as a shinobi,” Kakashi replied with a fake smile, not ready to listen to more stories that would remind him of what he didn’t have. 

He gave a curt “Good Night” before making his way out of the restaurant. Kakashi knew he needed to get away before he said something stupid that would ruin Tenzou and Iruka’s night together. 

He heard a distant “Kakashi” as Iruka called after him, but he decided to continue on his way thinking it was easier to run than to stay. Leaping over rooftops towards the Memorial Stone, Kakashi went to his safe place sure of the one person he could always talk to. 

“This is a disaster,” Kakashi said rubbing his fingers over Obito’s name. He sat there in silence for quite a while contemplating what had happened. 

When he’d calmed down a bit Kakashi listened to the sound of the wind blow through the trees and wondered how Obito felt when Rin looked at him. He was so uncaring at the time, but he thought Obito would have known what to tell him if he were still here. “How can I keep smiling and helping my friend when I like the same person? Is it always this hard to have friends?” He paused, “You died too soon for me to know.” 

Kakashi tensed up when he felt a chakra flare and heard the rustle of someone walking through the bushes. “I’m sorry Kakashi… I didn’t realize.” He heard the voice through the darkness as Tenzou stepped into the clearing. 

“Realize what?” Kakashi replied pretending he hadn’t said a word. 

“You like Iruka, and you still helped me through all that?” Tenzou asked. 

“You’re my friend, I want you happy,” Kakashi replied admitting that Tenzou was right without confirming it with exact words. 

“He ran after you…” Tenzou said, “But I knew where you’d be.” 

Kakashi scoffed at the idea that Tenzou knew him quite so well. “Not much of a secret hiding place is it.” 

Tenzou chucked with him, “You should go find him Kakashi… It wasn’t just Naruto that he couldn’t stop talking about.” 

Kakashi’s head snapped towards Tenzou. He didn’t understand. “What?” he had to ask to know for sure. 

“Just go after him, Kakashi,” Tenzou said, not quite as heartbroken as Kakashi would have expected. 

Kakashi didn’t waste a moment. He took off running before he even knew where to look for Iruka. 

While his house wasn’t a bad place to check it was just as silent and dark as when he’d left for dinner with no Iruka in sight. He started down a checklist of ideas, Iruka’s apartment or the academy seemed plausible, until the thought struck him about the story Iruka had been telling when Kakashi ran away. It should have been the first place Kakashi looked. 

There Iruka was, sitting deep in thought exactly where Kakashi had talked to him years ago. He watched Iruka for a minute, genuine even in his most down moments, and got an idea. 

“What’s troubling you now?” he asked having made his way into the tree mimicking they way he’d been sitting years before complaining about Iruka’s sighs. 

“Kakashi…” Iruka said, eyes wide as if he didn’t believe what he was seeing. 

“I…” Kakashi started but cut himself off; he didn’t know what to say. 

“Did you write those letters?” Iruka asked with trepidation. 

“What?” Kakashi questioned, not having expected that inquiry from Iruka. 

“It had your handwriting, and I couldn’t help but feel it had a lot of your personality in it.” 

“How... 

Iruka laughed a little, “You have some specific strokes to your style regardless of the chicken scratch.” 

“Why would you know my writing that well?” Kakashi asked, still in disbelief. 

Iruka shrugged his shoulders. 

Kakashi jumped down from the tree and joined Iruka on the bench. “Tenzou said you were telling stories about me…” It wasn’t as sly as he’d meant it to be, but it served its purpose as he could see Iruka look away. He was kind of cute when he was embarrassed. 

“I thought the letters were you the whole time, so when Yamato showed up with the last one, I was surprised. You disappeared before I got to finish it and give my reply to him. I was starting to think you didn’t even want to be near me. When you showed up tonight I realized how disappointed I was it hadn’t been you, and when you left like that I couldn’t stop myself from trying to understand, but I think I might get what happened.” 

“Do you now?” Kakashi knew Iruka was smart, so he wouldn’t be surprised if he had pieced it all together. 

“You helped Yamato write those letters because he’s your friend, but they aren’t fake… it’s how you feel… what you want to do with me.” The last part started to fade with embarrassment of what those letters contained. “Yamato is nice, but I like you. I have since you came to my rescue that day. It’s hard to not fall in love with someone that’s there when you need them.” 

“It’s had to not like someone who cares so much about everyone else over themselves,” Kakashi responded. 

Kakashi leaned towards Iruka, who closed the distance to kiss him through the mask. It was chaste with the fabric in their way, but made Kakashi feel like the world had changed in an instant. 

“So… Iruka would you like to go on a date with me?” Kakashi said, barely pulling back from their kiss. 

“I’d love to."


End file.
